social commentary Sunday . . . 'tackling the pressure of Christmas'

Seasons Greetings all,

Now I love a good festive activity & grateful exchange of love, stories, family time, however, I’m not religious – Christmas for me is about bringing a year to an end, reflecting, relaxing & raring to go for another year.  Depending on where we’re living & if my husband is home, we might do a fully-sparkling-real-Christmas tree with full decorations; be visiting family interstate; or have a quiet family lunch at home.  We keep the Christmas gifts to a minimum & focus on each child’s birthday as a special time to receive goodies (evenly paced throughout the year!!)  As a newly wed, I diligently hand wrote Christmas cards to everyone we knew, we had a new life in tropical Darwin to share; 2 years later we had a baby to blab about; another 2 years later ‘twins’ to show off; & another 2 years later . . . a fourth child to celebrate . . . that was 2004, the last year I sent cards. I don’t mind the Christmas newsletter email (no paper waste) but please don’t ask me to log onto a website to download your message.

 The pressure to spend – an ill disguised reserve-bank-interest-rate-cut-to-stimulate-the-retail-economy = the message “BLOW it on Christmas shopping” not “save it & pay off your mortgage sooner” as that would be sensible.  My children have never asked for the latest or greatest toy blazoned on the cover of those chain store catalogues.  I love that they have politely suggested they would like activities (books, board games, craft) & equally politely explained to me that clothes don’t count as gifts.  At least they know the difference between needs & wants!!

I don’t mind Christmas carols sung properly. . . sexy Christmas songs make my skin crawl & don’t get me started on sexy elves or a sexy Mrs Claus.  Advent calendars are a fun concept, we had them growing up with a chocolate per day. In Summer??  Molten chocolate welding a cardboard door you can’t open without a box cutter??  I like the new tact clever mums are using with “a family activity suggestion” behind each door, but I’d actually prefer my children to discover “a December chore to complete” . . . it’s bush fire hazard reduction time, school bags need to be emptied & swimming pools are full of Funnel Web Spiders!!    

 So everything is done & dusted, your husband is on leave, children on holidays, you literally have nothing to other than relax - in the cool change of the evening - with some television viewing, only it’s non rating season & it’s all rubbish. Australia has recently gained more channels on free-to-air television . . . unfortunately dedicated to extending home shopping/ sports/ repeats/ news.  Australia has very few Christmas themed movies, they’re ignored anyway, the choices are 1950’s American movie classics or 1990’s jovial ‘unfunny’ versions (complete with snow/ gift panic/ missing reindeer/ alcoholic Santa/ dysfunctional family “reuniting & saving Christmas”, yawn) . . . or be punished with A Christmas Carol, again.  Thank goodness gifts might include board games, books & the wonderful DVD series of your favourite shows!!

I do the Christmas shopping well in advance as I make better gift choices & the retail staff aren’t homicidal from listening to festive music.  The car parks become mine fields & just today at our local shops . . . a toddler was hanging around the top of the escalators, so I ushered him out of the way & tried to identify his mother – who came screaming over like I was a kidnapper.  Well yes, stranger danger but seriously, Mums – watch your children!!  We’ve witnessed a child fall to his death from the top of an escalator at a shopping centre, it happens!!  His mother was distracted. I have noticed - the shops are EMPTY - it’s no wonder gift cards are the hot item, you can’t go wrong & get great value in the sales.  Some argue it's thoughtless & 'just' cash, well, the thrill of Christmas gifts left me when i started earning my own money, mind you, my husband still surprises me, & it's not with a gift card!! 

 Finally, the all-consuming-all-day-lunch . . . my Mummy is English & granted we spent every second Christmas in Europe, so hot turkey, ham, pork, 15 vegetables & a massive pudding seems suitable, so long as we’re running a marathon before dinner, it is freezing Winter outside.  I’ve only ever seen my mother swear & slam the oven door . . . you guessed it . . . on Christmas day.  It was a military operation for her, the dining table was set a week in advance & we’d all have a polishing/ cleaning/ folding/ primping job. We are a large family but the world’s biggest turkey which takes forever to cook . . . why can’t any host born after say 1960 just admit it’s a tough meat to master, swap it for two small turkeys or something they are used to perfecting, like chicken!! Do we really need ham & pork too??  Our family got so big (14 grandchildren) so as my parents got older, even though they had 4 capable married children (8 extra pairs of adults hands) they hired staff to serve us.  We had pork in a Weber BBQ; ham in the kitchen oven & turkey in a commercial oven installed in the old billiard room downstairs, for big catering events. Add to that 22+ people & the fact it’s 35C outside, all we wanted to do was swim!!  Our Christmas lunch commenced with champagne & seafood, however, we’d still be very happy with one meat & sacrifice a dozen vegetables for lunch, so we genuinely had room for pudding served with lashings of brandy butter.  As Mum relaxed with age, she’d let us swim before dessert & also let us help ourselves to cold cuts for dinner, she stopped martyring herself over every detail once she turned about 60.  Hallelujah.  That’s the spirit, friendly & happy. 

 When we build our homestead & have a farm, I imagine we’ll be staying home or hosting Christmas.  Apart from the fact we live 200km from our nearest relative, going away for Christmas is a huge task + horror on the roads.  We will have a traditional roast, perhaps we might raise our own reasonably-sized-turkey or tastey venison, served with seasonal vegetables from the garden & if the children have a specialty dessert or fantastic sauce they make, wonderful!!  Specialty contributions, not strict traditions!!  Just light & happy, with lots of swimming & genuine relaxation, unrushed & truly enjoying each other’s company.

I have never understood the pressure of having to attend lunch with one family & dinner with another, ON Christmas day.  Especially with alcohol flowing freely.  We have already said to our children – there are four of you, you’ll each have partners one day, with their family demands, spend Christmas with them if you wish & Boxing Day or another day in December with us – we are not scoring points on who is with us on the actual 25^th of December.  Just remove the pressure & stress off everyone, especially in a large network.  I bet our Christmases as parents of adult children & grandparents will be wonderful celebrations.  

Are you making changes on how to cope with crazy chaotic Christmas??  Love Posie

image credits

the twilight zone time of year

Greetings all,

Don't you find this time of year a bit like the Twilight Zone, stuck in no man's land, exhausted without direction??  Full belly from Christmas, family overload & sale shopping . . . if you can get off the lounge, afternoon naps, who lives like this??  It's actually difficult to move forward when you're all planned out & feeling so lazy without an agenda.

A little replay of our Christmas . . . children waited for me to watch them open their Santa sacks (i've never had a child wake before 7a.m. even at Christmas!!)  Lots of family phone calls, while i made iced tea & mango crushes . . .

 we had pancakes & croissants while the boy finished off each of his sisters' drinks!!

 Fun & games until someone gets burnt!!  Quick call to my brother for a complimentary Christmas Day burns victim consultation on my 3rd girl who spent 20 minutes with her upper arm under cold running water. 

 Lunch was Italiano style - simple & delicious, but with hiccups - i put the smoked salmon out first . . . my son ate the entire platter before anyone even sat down & there were tears as we all missed handsome soldier.  Then huge scoops of gelato in waffle cones, completely untraditional but it was truly all about fun for the children.  

 Someone got a sequin pineapple purse (we watched The September Issue on Boxing Day, poses were struck).  I have devoured Vogue since i was a young girl, i find high fashion utterly fascinating.  I'm so far from a model, but what an interesting life, one of my girls would like to model.

 Could not believe my luck at the Country Road sale, the ONLY pair of moccasins they had were red & in my size, yay!!  My girls acted like porters & carried the shopping, so cute, especially as i loaded them up on 6 new beach towels & homewares.  Also picked up the kaftan i had on my ultimate gift list, $80 off!!

 Slightly in shock my first born wears a size 39 shoe, she's not quite 13!!  I've had to hunt down suitable flat ladies shoes for her since she was 9, i wait for sales - she did well today.  Thrilled with my new foxy shoulder bag from Hive & this oversized beach hat from Trenery.  I am not a hat person, but who cares in Summer??  Time to done the Miu Mius.

So i spent my 36th Christmas afternoon, dozing on the lounge reading the new cookbooks the children received, putting a disected shark will full plastic anatomy together . . . listening to a storm pelting the roof, wearing new Peter Alexander slippers, i felt so OLD!!  As the children got bikes early for Christmas, their gifts were few & practical - like clothes, educational toys & VS hair dryers - how much fun is 'the big hair styler', it rolls & spins & doesn't tangle!! 

Thanks for the gorgeous well wishes this Christmas, i've been able to chat & Skype my husband a couple of times each day, takes the sting out of missing him.  We've also found a property i like & he's agreed to consider, yahoo!!  It's smaller (about 70 acres) & below our budget, in a great location.  Progress!!  Love Posie

we wish you a Merry Christmas . . .

Greetings all,
I love that i live in a city that is occupied with interstaters (including me) as they all flee for Christmas (excluding me) . . . i swan around the supermarket aisles, shops & streets with ease.  It's hard to build traditions around Christmas when you're in a different city/ family member's house/ hotel/ husband away each year - i can't wait for stability, Christmas in our own home, with my husband & all the beautiful English traditions my mother instilled in us - especially the food.  I want to make Christmas pudding everyone has stirred, i want to deck the halls with holly & i want to host Christmas!! 

I put the special Oxfam decorations my dear friend Lisa gave each of my children on our cute wooden tree.  See the little early gift i gave myself - a Red Riding Hood teapot.  Next year i want to force myself to like tea.

 Last minute school class party reindeer cupcakes, they finally finished school on Wednesday, poor little public schoolers.  In the meantime, my high schooler & i took in lots of movies (Mission Impossible is amazing), shopping & lunches out, lovely!!  Her boy-who-is-a-friend tagged along too, he's one patient young man!! 

 I'm retiring my cute animal calendar this year . . .

 with this neat one from Kikki-K, about $12 in their early Boxing Day sale.  Note: i got the '21 Days to Start/ End Habits' in preparation of new year's resolutions.  Hey, i bought the book, that's a start, i'm already on my way . . . mind, body & soul!!

 In my effort to like tea, i have tried for many years to stomach hot tea but iced tea is my baby step.  I've just brewed my second batch of T2 White Christmas, chilling in the fridge, some of the children like it too, filled up with lemon slices & mint.  I also got Tummy Tea to help with digestion & flush out the demons of Christmas feasting. 

 The 2L tall jug is too big for any shelf in the fridge so she lives in the door or filled with ice on the counter on her rubbery coaster.

 Some last minute decoration finds at Hive, already know what my colour scheme for next Christmas is, lime, fuchsia & silver, pretty right??

 Found this red brick filled ornament in my letter box, thanks Lego!!

 Keen??  Me??  At the Seed sale at 9a.m. for shoes - the last year my youngest children will fit into their shoes as they only go up to size 35.  The sequin & polka dot shoes were reduced to $15!!  The strappy gold ones were reduced to $30, wish they had my size!! 

 So Merry Christmas blogland, have thoroughly enjoyed your company this year.

Have a wonderful time with family, friends, or indulging alone if that's your thing.  I'll be blogging over Summer so don't be a stranger, love Posie

like my parents always said "the joy of Christmas is watching children play & feeling lucky you have them!!"

Greetings all,

I had a charmed childhood, i was truly lucky & knew nothing of unhappiness or wanting for anything - toys, travel, love, siblings, pets, friends - shockingly, we weren't spoilt brats, as good manners & appreciation was top of my parent's list of priorities.  My parents were born in the Depression & instilled in us, if you have children, you make them feel so wanted & give them the best you can offer, if only your love, time & energy as sometimes that is all you have.  Hell yeah, been there!! 

Christmas can be a mass consumer explosion if you let it.  We've lived on a tight budget for a long time & i don't think my children even realise we give them clothes & things they need as 'gifts'.  Trust me when i say they needed the new bikes - it's freedom & adventure.  I like the basics, the outdoors . . . do trampolines ever disappoint??

 We went to Bowral on the weekend to visit my sister for an early Christmas.  It has certainly taken the edge off Christmas day for me, i've seen some family & while it's another Christmas with my husband away at war, we can still have a typical Australian Summer of fun. 

 Those Australian Summers also include severe thunder storms!!

 Not that it made any difference to the children - look at that rain!! 

 They had a huge seven-cousin-spa to warm up, then we opened presents.  Fantastic - the entire Harry Potter book & DVD set.  My darling boy started reading the first book in the car trip home (my children are keen readers, my husband is a voracious reader too, good for them, i'd rather be sewing!!)   

 I forced my children to surrender my sister's new pussy cat - her husband found this darling little creature at a work site, why are people so unkind, to animals??   This cat has won the lottery with my sister's 3 gentle animal loving children & kudos to my tough brother-in-law with his marshmellow centre.

 Loving the new tyres on my 4WD as it poured the whole 400km trip.  I knew it wasn't good when i saw an ambulance, then rescue truck, then police cars, then this mess - you can just see the blue sign, it says 'stop, revive, survive' in front of a car wrapped around a tree.  It was a timely reminder how lucky we are to be alive.  Full stop.   

So grim.  No point pretending bad things don't happen (we're realistic with my husband's line of work) so i used it as a lesson in defensive driving for my eldest, who will be on the road in a few short years.  There are constant fears & hurdles to overcome with your children, driving has to be one of the biggest.  In the meantime, very much embracing the joy of watching my children play & feeling so so lucky i have them this Christmas.  Love Posie

i've got Christmas totally wrapped up

Greetings all,

Phew, marathon wrapping session yesterday, all the nieces & nephews, our parents & those pesky people who also have birthdays in December & January too, now i can post them off to 3 main family focal points later this week. 

Armed with some brown paper, twine, tags, tape & feature wrap, i got busy.  The children were out on their bikes so i managed to wrap most of their gifts too!!

 Don't the gifts look sweet??

 While my eldest daughter was out with her boy-who-is-a-friend, the other children decorated the Christmas tree & i continued to wrap on the kitchen counter.  It took a few goes, they didn't follow the golden rules of: check the lights work, then add evenly to tree; add tinsel, green is great on a cheap & nasty plastic tree, bulks it up; then decorations & finally add the special angel 

 It's just not Christmas when handsome soldier is away, so we didn't do a real tree, sigh.

 However, the same quantity of decorations we'd apply to an 8' real tree, we slathered onto our 3' plastic wonder.  I kind of like it.

 I helped fill in some gaps the children left.

 The love birds made me miss my husband even more.

 I love my fabric, glittery & fluffy birds too!!

 It looked so lovely last night, one child fell asleep on the lounge so i tucked her in & left the lights on.  It was so dreamy.  I stayed up waiting for my first born to be returned, at almost midnight, must have been a good date??!!  They are great mates & i adore the whole family, it's so lovely that my girl has such a nice 'introduction' to boys, which isn't always smooth, especially when you're at an all girls school & mostly all girls family.  The mummy (she has 4 boys also welcomes our families mixing) said they talked non stop for 12 hours, swimming, at a BBQ, a Christmas party & just hanging out!!

Thanks to forward planning & minimal events in December, i can glide into Christmas with ease now, all pressure lifted.  A big hello to my handsome soldier too, i know he's missing all this & as much as it upsets him, here are the photos . . . he was home last Christmas, it was fantastic, crazy but in the past 2 years he's been home with us for only a few weeks, ditto for the next 2 years THEN he's all ours, we'll have our home & yikes, 3 girls in high school.  Love Posie

it's beginning to look a lot like i should be doing more Christmas shopping

Greetings all,

A little bit thrilled with this wooden tree from TYPO, but really, it just reminds me that i really should knock over the Christmas shopping for others, not myself.  I'm not spending Christmas Day with any family this year (is it wrong that i feel empowered??) but i have to get gifts to them.  I plan to do up a hamper for each family (5-6 people, 10 families + individual gifts for the children).  Honestly, until i get a date for hand surgery, it's just not at the forefront of my mind.

 I dream, in the future, this hook-laden-tree, will hold the keys to our cars, tractor & quad/ trail bikes.  Isn't that cool & scary at the same time, my children on the road, eeek.  I loathe looking for keys, especially if like on "The Castle" we need to move 4 children's cars out of the way to get to mine!! 

 With Christmas gift hampers in mind, i headed to the Farmer's Market on Saturday to scout for ideas.  Brandy Butter, Puddings, Organic Chocolates . . . mmmm.  With only 3 children doing Little Athletics, i took my solo 3rd girl with me, unfortunately she's the hungriest child on earth & eats her way through the samples like Homer Simpson.  I oblige by buying what she recommends . . . 5kg fruit, juice, lunch & dinner (rolled roast beef) for the entire weekend.  So easy to feed my athletes lunch of Turkish Bread & avocado dip.  I'd never offered my children honeycomb??  Yumbo.  

 Bottom of the barrel $5 lillies, thank you!!

 This little runner & jumper won her hurdles, high & long jump on Saturday.  When we had twin babies, we decided to raise them independent of each other & not compare.  But this year in the same class - who gets to be class captain??  They took it in turns, unspoken agreement to nominate for different semesters (still voted by class mates, they're not dictators!!)  It didn't occur to me until year 2 that actual races . . . with places, would mean direct competition & comparison.  As it turns out, they  take it in turns (on ability, trust me, they zoom past each other without a side glance on the track) winning the 200m, 800m, long jump & cross country each year.  Oh look, you can see her latest missing tooth. 

How is your Monday??  I have to return to school at midday with a swim suit for this clown above who has swimming lessons.  Argh!!  Her sister & brother sensibly wore their suits, ready for the pool & of course, when i dropped them this morning she blankly looked at me & said "no one told me to put my towel & swimming costume in my bag".  Oh those are the Monday mornings you just want to scream, but i didn't, i had two choices: buy a new costume & towel in the city, or go home, collect & deliver.  I went home & blogged.  We live out of town, i'm not making 3 trips, so i'll get back to Christmas shopping list. 

Are you knocking over the Christmas shopping??  Are you actually not religious but everyone expects a gift anyway??  Do you think nieces & nephews over 18 should still get gifts from you??  I have 19 nieces & nephews, time to cull a few, non??  It's hard not to be the token bahhumbug, we have large families & i wonder if they even care, when they get a gift in the mail, among so many others??  I ponder, love Posie

more IKEA love & Christmas is really over now . . .

Greetings all,
Wow, just as the last of the 10 lucky IKEA Beloved book winners was emailing her details yesterday, a courier rocked up to my door with this IKEA 10kg meatball box of excitement, as a thank you to me.  Little old me!!  All super handy things . . . photo frames, candles, tea lights, thermos, bowls, cannisters, loopy hanger, bag clips, scrubbers, napkins, paper plates . . . even a floor mat.  Trust me IKEA, it was a pleasure to do the store tour in Sydney & present the giveaway.

 I knew where i wanted the floor mat to go, i love stripes & i love this mix of red, navy & natural wood in my son's room, it had to be his!!  I'm someone who can see a room decorated before we even move into a house (we move often) & i am pretty sure in my teens i imagined i'd have a son with a bedroom which looked something like this.

 My son is turning into the mathematician i am, i adore this abacus & it's one of his favourite toys.  We're learning together how to use it properly. 

 I lit some tea lights - they smell like fruits, ahhhh.  The girls disappeared into their rooms with the containers & cannisters for . . . girls' stuff. 

 Of course when i thought 'bowls' my son thought 'robot helmet'. 

 The IKEA goodies were a lovely surprise to my day, a little glum after taking down all the Christmas decorations on the traditional 6th January - just as my mother taught me.  Sigh, packing them away for another 11 months, sob.  The tree will go to the green waste down the road (when the family car is back from what is proving to be an expensive service) & our lounge room just won't smell the same. 

 Just couldn't bare to hide the hearts i collected for the tree, so i looped some of them together & hung them where a Christmas garland once was.  Couldn't resist at least one giant jingle bell which rings out with the breeze.

 As always . . . the worst job is removing the fairy lights.  So complicated no matter how easily my tall husband effortlessly loops them on.  I'm only 5'6" so i always end up tangled in the lights as i unwind them from the tree.  He'd help but watching me doing it is far more entertaining.

So we cuddled up last night without the backdrop of a flashing coloured light show or a woody pine forest smell, just the sweet glow from tea lights & scent of fresh flowers.  
Christmas is a time of year i really like to drag out for as long as possible, it's happiness, sunshine, family, swimming & holidays, visiting our elderly parents & extended families, especially this one just past - my handsome soldier was home.  He's about to move back to Qld for 2 years (of a 3 year posting) . . . i have a big couple of years ahead of me of solo parenting!!  It's technically called 'dual solo' parenting, honestly, it's the parent on the ground who is doing the heavy lifting thanks, anything my husband tries to offer from thousands of kilometres away, really, in the heat of the moment, it's not particularly helpful.  Ha ha, he's going to retire in his early 40s when we have 3 teenage girls in the house.  Anyway, he will 'move back in' with us in January 2013, how sad does that sound??  He has an incredibly busy 2 years all over the place, so it wouldn't matter where we lived, he wouldn't be 'home'.  But 2013 is our year, building our homestead!!  Have lovely weekends everyone, love Posie