good afternoon, come in to my office . . .

Greetings all,
Do you remember having an office job??  Or, an office??  Or indeed, a job!!  One where people would knock & wait to be asked to come in, not burst through a door open or closed, whether you're on the phone or deep in thought, squealing "muuuum . . ."  I haven't been in a meeting, board room or office chair since 2001 . . . & with a sewing machine on my desk ever since, i find different pockets & places to do the business-of-family administration.  These days, when all is quiet, i use the kitchen counter. 

 I pour myself a drink, light a candle, grab my note pads, phone, calendar & pen, flick through a cookbook & today . . . fill out orthopaedic hand surgeon paperwork. 

 Then label a million back-to-school-books/ folders/ stationery & wonder why i chose to have children with a man with such a long surname.

 Ponder the fruit bowl, needs some effort.  I want to get back into a routine of going to the fresh food market on Thursdays, farmer's markets are a chore on weekends with sports.

 My last paid employment (before sewing at home) was at a fuel farm, as an oil barroness, managing commercial services for the entire Northern Territory.  Yes, i used to be someone, meeting VIP oil, energy & gas executives from around the world & fine dining with my trophy husband!!  I was the only girl & heavily pregnant with twins when i finished - they were born the day after i left . . . sitting in my huge leather office chair in air conditioning was the only place i was comfortable, so i worked until the last moment.  I really enjoyed my work, the truck drivers (who drive those long road trains) would bring me homegrown mangoes & knock off early on Fridays for drinks.  As i had my first daughter months after finishing University, this was my ONLY proper full time job, then i retired aged 26, a mother of 3. 
I used to spend my afternoons checking transfers of millions of litres/ dollars worth of fuel & liaise with head office in Melbourne over the dozen departments i headed.  Now i spend my afternoons sorting laundry & preparing dinner before the school run.  I've never worked harder in my life, but i know what i enjoy more (i love housework, i find it relaxing).  My husband misses the grid girls though.
I love looking back & remembering what i used to do.  I remember all my part time jobs, Uni & high school so vividly.  I love listening to my eldest talk about her days/ friends/ classes & now (as she's in year 8) about how cute the little year 7s are!!  I have less than 10 years left in this school mother game, i honestly think life speeds up the older you get!!  I've designed an office nook in our homestead plans, i don't want an official office, just a little space, maybe behind doors, perhaps sound proofed??  Love Posie

perfection, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder

Greetings all,
I love perfection, it's . . . perfect.  However, the things i find perfect are . . . a blooming fragrant rose (nature), correct spelling (academics), fingerprintless windows (cleanliness) . . . tangible objects, 100% achievable, realistic pursuits.  I believe a dessert chef can ice a cake to perfection, a lawyer try the perfect case & an athlete run the perfect race.  So why are we consumed by 'the perfect mother'??  Exactly what is the job description??  Ask your children who is the perfect mother, pretty sure they'll say "you mummy"!!  They don't know human beings are flawed, they just love you despite your hiccups. 

I was thinking about this perfect mother myth while i was baking cookies tonight.  Lovely Magi's post on ToffeeAppleMama blog was playing on my mind . . . she used the perfect mother reference (Magi is a wholesome & dedicated mama of four who tries as hard as me to make for a lovely happy family life.)  I baked over 2 dozen chocolate chip cookies - the last four warranted their own baking tray.  When they came out i said to the children, "look, these cookies are perfect" & they were in every way - cooked through, crunchy on the outside, gooey on the inside, the oven was at the right temperature, on their own spacious tray, they had every chance to be the best damn cookies they could be.  But . . . an uber healthy mum wouldn't consider them perfect (sugar, butter, chocolate), the Country Women's Association could bake neater cookies & if they were rolled properly/ equally/ perfectly as Donna Hay's recipe reads, it would have been 2 dozen cookies, on 2 trays.     

My point is, they were perfect to me, as i made them with love for my children's lunch boxes when they resume school tomorrow; i slotted them into an afternoon of mowing lawns, cooking lasagne - sharing the heat of the oven; & ironing uniforms.  Effort, taste & execution, 10/10. 
Now i'm no literary scholar & i feel my cookie analogy isn't flowing as poetically as it did in my head in the oven . . . but this whole perfect mother thing, who exactly are we comparing ourselves with or trying to impress??  Please don't say a celebrity mother.  Or the mum at the school gate/ park/ swimming lesson next to you.  Mother, remember, you got that title by having your children & their opinion is the only one that matters!!  Everyone leads different lives, better, worst, happy, sad, richer, poorer.  It's all relative, it changes constantly, you have every chance to be a winner in this mothering game, it's dynamic & some days you make triumphant cookies, other days you miss a child's concert.  There is alway time to pick up your game when things are rocky, or ease off when things are smooth. 

I am the perfect mother to my own children.  I give them what they need in everything i do from the conversations we have on school runs (an independent mother would have them catch the bus), the way i run their forgotten lunch/ sneakers/ projects up to school in the middle of the day (a hard mummy would make them learn their lesson) & discipline with a home schedule (a hippie mama would let days unfold organically).  Sometimes i'm 1 step ahead of my children & all over their next stage . . . sometimes i'm 2 steps behind & not ready for their new attitude, academic level, what their friends are allowed to do/ say/ watch/ go.  I am the perfect mother to my own children as i never give up trying.  Love Posie

i'm grateful for . . . 'feeling the love'

Greetings all,
With Valentine's Day coming up, i thought i'd do a pretty picture post.  I'm often told my blog oozes love, well right back at you, from your comments - i feel it & kind of need it.  Coming up on 5 months since i last saw/ held/ hugged/ kissed my husband . . . needless to say we don't bother celebrating anniversaries, ANY day we spend together is special.

 This week's Kidspot Grateful is about smiling at strangers, well i smile, chat & laugh with strangers ALL the time, i was raised with the old "if you don't have a smile, you can have one of mine" smiles-are-free-attitude.  With my teenager, sometimes that smile comes with a poke, tickle or joke (& a crowbar) why they frown so much, i have no idea.   

 So you know what puts a smile on my face??  Coming home from holidays to 2 Mollie Makes magazines & i'll share them with smiley friends & we'll suggest Mollie to strangers in craft shops who'll smile too!!

 Oh sweet embroidery, i can't wait to regain my skills!!

 Crochet love heart bunting, say no more!!

 My sweet boy received a Valentine from his adorable preschool girlfriend & is returning the favour (5 years & counting).

 Made for a great school holiday activity.  All the children made up cards & letters for their Daddy too.  I love the image of soldiers receiving heart stamped, pink & scented mail in war zones.

So my friends, this is our last weekend before school resumes on Tuesday & first weekend home since Christmas, so it's a blur of pressing uniforms & piecing sports uniform emsembles together, mowing lawns & weeding.  Needless to say my hands & elbows (ouch) are on ice each afternoon.  Forgive me if i'm a bit quiet for a few days, remembering how to be a school mum.  Love Posie
PS the Laura Ashley scarf in the top image was an i-love-me gift, under $20 on sale, such a beautiful shade of watermelon red!!

who do you think you are . . . the blog version

Greetings all,
I enjoy the television series Who Do You Think You Are?? where experts help celebrities track their ancestry . . . i find personal history simply fascinating.  My Australian side of the family goes back to an Irish convict stone mason who made good & married the daughter of the Governor of NSW & was land granted The Rocks on Sydney Harbour.  Oh yes, gimme some of that land now thanks, billions of dollars worth.  Hmmm, where did it all go??  

When i swung by my childhood home recently, i quickly took snaps of some of the family photos down the hallways.  Here i am, aged 4 at preschool.  My mother perfected ill fitting frames for photos, please endure my pain.

 My parents 1955 Christmas Eve wedding, look at my Grandfather Sidney on the right, so like Winston Churchill.  You know back in these days, there wasn't a wedding budget, everyone was poor, dresses were borrowed, people from the village helped with catering & flowers!!  It was all love. 

 My English farm girl Mummy met my Australian Navy Daddy 5 months earlier & he went back to his ship after a brief honeymoon while Mum became a Ten Pound Immigrant, sailing off to Australia to meet & live with his parents, whom she'd never met & didn't know if she'd ever see her family again!!  My father made visiting England & bringing Mum's parents to Australia for holidays, our family priority. 

 Look at my brothers, these little little boys grew up to become a surgeon & rocket scientist, now in their early 50s with 7 fabulous children between them.

 My sister & i, at my wedding (i didn't want bridesmaids, but she dressed like one anyway) we grew up to become a ballerina & pharmacologist, also with 7 children between us.

 Yes, my parents have a picture of my year 12 formal.  My boyfriend du jour couldn't come so i took my sister's husband.  He's French & i told everyone he couldn't speak English so he didn't have to suffer small talk.  We still laugh about this, 20 years later, yep, this year is my 20 year school reunion, i'm so excited.

 The following year i met handsome soldier at Sydney University Army Reserve & married him in 1997 . . .

 2 years after that we had our first baby & he went to his first war!!  Promise i'll show my husband's face when he retires.

 Then we had twins . . .

 & when i fixed the framed picture of my "4 under 5", more photos fell out . . . look at my baby boy on the left!! 

So there you have the modern history of Who I Think I Am!!  You should do this too, it was really fun.  Love Posie

3000km, 4 children, 4 bikes, 1 mum, 1 dog & a shark!!

Greetings all,

'It's about the journey, not the destination' well, not when the destination is gorgeous & sunny Brisbane in Summer & 2500km of the round trip is in torrential rain.  It was tense!!  All these images are taken in the middle of the day, in Summer, crazy right??!!

 We had 3 weeks of glorious sunshine then 10 days of rain, with more & more rain forecast (poor Queensland) so we left early, as the highways kept closing due to flooding. The children were fantastic, they are great travellers & read, chat, sing & sight see.  Note: they all have a spare seat between them!!  Bringing the dog was the BEST distraction for our 3rd girl who doesn't love car travel, he also made a comfortable cushion.

 This darling puppy spent his 4th birthday looking out the window in the centre row of the car, bless his heart.  He even had a sleepover with his puppy cousins (Boxer dogs Lily & Saffron) on the way home, saved me finding an animal friendly motel.  The children sprayed him with air freshener & he didn't even smell like wet-dog, brilliant!!

 At one stage on the New England Highway, after 100km of pot holes & heinous driving conditions with mist, road works, rain & P platers flying past me . . . there was a sign saying "Warning Oil Spill".  Are you kidding me, what else could you throw at me??!! 

 I stopped by my brother's place for dinner on the way home & his wife presented my son with a helium filled remote controlled shark, LIFE SIZE (almost) & i was just thinking, 1000km to go, now, with a shark floating around the car!! 

 So with all that road side rain, our pit stops were few & short.  Needless to say, we travelled with towels & had the parks to ourselves!!

 We also stopped by my parents new cottage in the country, so cute, look at this view out of their kitchen window onto the side drive.  Leaving busy Sydney was the best decision, the calm has given them a new lease on life.

 Oh hello, i wanted to rip this oven from their cooking nook & take it with me!!  My parents are so happy here, under my doctor brother's care.  They live in a 2 bedroom cosy cottage (which my brother owns & maintains), they walk into town for coffee each day, Dad has lost 15kg & reduced his drugs by 75%, amazing.  Mums seems happy, she's past the horrible Alzheimer's stage & is now very clingy with Dad, which he adores, constantly holding his hand & whispering to him.  57 years of marriage people!! 

I am thrilled to wave the flag for the ACT, as we crossed the border from NSW, we had dry roads & sunshine, it was overcast but finally, unpacking the car in dry weather!!  I was happy to come home to a spotless house, so glad i made the effort, knowing we were going for 5 weeks over Summer . . . our lovely neighbours even parked their uncle's car in our driveway as 'faux inhabitants' & collected our mail (which included a $7.69 fine for using the Go Between Bridge in Brisbane) on our way to South Bank, ooppss.  Love Posie
PS thank you all so much for the girl-power-happy-thoughts & love in my last post, things are still on track (real estate wise) so we're holding our breath.

social commentary Sunday . . . 'are you on the verge of a better you??'

Greetings all,

I've been skirting around a lot of things lately.  Where i am & how i am.
I just spent 5 glorious weeks in Brisbane, at my husband's bachelor pad - swimming, thinking, cycling, baking, reading, walking, eating, shopping, cooking, exercising . . . restoring my mind, body & soul.  2011 was a tough year for many, me included.  To recap the lows, my mother has Alzheimer's & doesn't recognise me; my husband is away at war for 9 months; i gained a lot of weight; & i have such bad carpal tunnel syndrome, i can barely grip cutlery, pegs, pens, scissors . . . devestating when you are a designer.  Makes for a sad crafty blog when you can barely craft (i've been losing followers, sorry i can't sustain you) thanks to everyone else hanging in there with me.

My Brisbane-escape-focus was on the children & planning how to tackle this year, which will be HUGE.  With the pending sale of our Darwin apartment & my heart set on a Canberra property . . . it's easy to get lost in all the plans.  I crave time with my husband & how he makes me feel - loved, safe, happy.  I've been madly in love with him for half my life.  His current posting was 2 years with 1 deployment, sure, i'm busy with sewing & the children, we can manage it . . . then parenting got serious with a high schooler & my hands became so retarded, halting time spent in my studio, which was my happy place, the balance was out, way out.  Handsome soldier's 2 year posting became 4 years with another deployment, i'm focussing on the bigger picture, our future as a family unit again, in 2014 on a farm, as far off as it seems.

Just at the right time last year, lovely Jane from Life on Planet Baby, sent me a link to the Brave Girls Club - two American sisters who run 'empowering women workshops' (my words) & send daily emails, a personal pick-me-up-girl-power for the day.  I'm not spiritual, however, their words speak-to-me!!  Wouldn't you know - these words arrived in my InBox - after refuelling my soul & ready to resume my real life again.     

We are all 'too important to wear out' . . . last year, i.was.worn.out!!  It's so unhealthy.  'Souls need kindness', why are we so unkind to ourselves or let people be unkind to us?? 

Subscribe to their daily emails, they speak to you, trust me!!

Even successful & confident people can struggle to believe in themselves, especially on the verge of such huge changes & unknown possibilities in their personal lives.  I strive to be independent, yet, so much lies in the hands, advice & belief of others - for us right now, it's property buyers & sellers!!  We're on the edge of it all falling into place, it's nerve wracking & exciting, a big financial puzzle with many players, it's difficult to be patient.  I'm glad for the journey, as much as i want to race to the destination, clearing all the hurdles along the way with ease . . . i still feel we need a lot of luck & good timing in this world.  I'm ready, i'm on the verge of being a much better me, i can feel it now . . . a smooth property sale/ purchase & more time with my husband is a lovely bonus.  Love Posie
PS thank you for asking about my hands, i don't want to bore you all & constantly talking about my carpal tunnel syndrome, even though it dominates my days . . . i'm seeing the hand surgeon next month!!

Australia Day . . . nom nom nom

Greetings all & happy Australia Day!!

We did the typical Australian things today . . . slipped on thongs & went swimming, bike riding & ate up a storm.

 One of my favourite things about Australia & Australians . . . is our sense of humour, even at the guarded entrances on military bases!!

 Our menu was a rolling brunch of multicultural delights - French croissants, Italian sausages, Greek salad, Kiwi Fruit & Canadian bacon (only joking, Darling Downs bacon!!)

 Here's a crowd pleaser for brunch, i've never made French toast before, so i gave it a go today - savoury sandwich style!! 

 Basic French toast . . . gently whisk eggs (1 egg per 2 slices of multigrain bread) coat bread generously & fry, then pop in the oven to keep warm; fry ham, bacon & eggs (both sides).  

 Composition . . . layer toast, ham, bacon, egg + fancy cheese if you have some, i didn't think that far ahead, gruyere would be perfection & i'd add sprouts or herbs too.  Slice into fingers!!

Serve with a Finnish napkin, da dah!!  How Australian was that??  Love Posie