31 March 2012

i'm grateful for . . . 'chit chat'

Greetings all,
Coming down from the high which was a family reunion/ 4 flights in 4 days/ my father's 80th birthday last weekend, i've had a busy week maintaining the momentum with children's events . . . Academic Awards, volleyball clinic, Suburban Challenge (think town planning for senior primary schoolers, then imagine my 3rd girl winning!!)  Of course, a whole lot of chit cat is involved . . . at the school gate, with teaching staff, at sports games & with my family of marathon talkers.  Can you overdose on chit chat??  Impossible for me . . . which is why my only-speak-when-has-something-worth-saying-husband is so complimentary to my world.  I remember on one of our first dates, he actually said "you don't have to fill every silence & externalise every thought that pops into my head".  Gosh i love his confidence.
My children are all varying combinations of chitter chatters . . . my 3rd girl can play in her room for hours, in solitude, where my first born can gabble away like any teen, but loves her silence.  I'm sure she was reading in the womb, like handsome soldier, she can read for days, it's an escape.  Makes her a fabulous flying companion & easy to entertain.  She just read The Hunger Games yesterday, as in, before school & after dinner, gobbled it up, asleep by midnight.  How??  Took me 4 days of dedicated reading chunks & neglecting housework!!   
My next girl, wow, she floors me with her ability to read, as she is such a huge talker & story teller, yet she reads all 7 Harry Potter books every school holidays, over again.  I love this balance of social jibber jabber & silence, she fits more into her day than anyone i know.   
I often wonder how my constant banter affects my children??  It has been a very successful experiment in socialising them, as until recently, every 2 years they were plonked into a new school/ city/ environment & left to make friends - just like that.  No consistency of childhood friendships, constantly leaving what they know & being dropped in the deep end.  Their conversation skills have assisted their resilience & made every Army move easy.  The teachers always say "you're so social Jennie" but personality traits don't automatically translate to children, i guess i got lucky.    
I know my boy craves more time with boys, he loves his cousins, he misses Daddy.  I don't care so much for this genderless society which is politically correct, boys need men in their lives, good solid male role models.  They talk about completely different things to me. 
On my weekend away, i shared a room with my son (the 3 girls had their own room) & i love having him to myself.  Being alone with your child, one on one, they think, ask questions, it's special.  Then he asked me to talk him to sleep, the last word on my chit chat skills!! 
Small talk with my parents, i miss this, my Mum's Alzheimer's has taken this away.  Aimed at me is polite conversation, like i'm the waitress at a cafe, gone is any depth or recognition of our history.  I can't have indepth debates with my father either, as Mum constantly interupts or he's distracted by her, it's really hard to process, it's exhausting actually, small talk is all we manage. 
So Maxabella Loves, I'm Grateful for 'chit chat' which runs very deep with me, love Posie

18 comments:

Felicity said...

Your communication skills, whether they be chit-chat, written notes or your blog posts always impress me with their sparkle.

As for your children and their reading - LOVE IT!

Happy weekend Gorgeous,
x F

TexWisGirl said...

what a sweet post. love hearing about your kids. and makes meaningful conversations so important - with your mom. i lost my mom to alzheimer's, too. i used to live for her weekly letters. then it became less and more spiraled. and became an 'assignment' for her to write to me...

ally said...

Chit-chat seems to be a word almost too small and insignificant for the roles that voice and conversation and connection play in your life Jennie.
Keep that chat coming...and that reading

One pair of Hands said...

Jennie my theory is that if we females didn't talk a blue streak at every opportunity when our children are little, nobody would ever learn to talk. Think about it; with a talkative Mum babies become aware of language in the womb and will have a great grasp on words and how to use them as they grow up hearing conversation every day. You've done a great job giving your children an interest in words and it is showing. Congratulations.

Lipgloss Mumma said...

You are amazing Posie. Just sayin'.

Kellie Collis said...

Your kids are lovely! Have a fabulous weekend, Kellie xx

Jan-Maree said...

Ah I love that your kids read. Mine used to and I worked really hard to keep them into it but as teens they are far too cool - I hope that they grow into it again soon

Jane said...

Oh Jennie. I particularly relate to the last point,as you can imagine. It's so distressing seeing the shadow of the person you knew. The grieving had already started for me then, I felt. So glad you pulled it all off and enjoyed yourself - you are astounding. J x

Shelley @ My Shoebox Life said...

Always brings a smile to face when I come to visit and catch up on your blog! Sounds like you've had a fabulous time. I am on holidays next week myself and would love to actually start reading Harry Potter. I am still yet to read any of them! xx

NessaKnits said...

When my son was about 4 he was chit chatting away in a supermarket and I was wishing he would be a little quieter and somebody said to me "gee, how old is he, boy he is articulate", and he was and I appreciated the chit chat then!

Kylie said...

I love a good chit chat with you - if it be over the phone, at SIT, on the couch in the bachelor pad, while watching the kids swim and take themself off for medical assistance or whilst standing in the baking sun that was Darwin at a market.
Love a good chit-chat with my friend Jen:)
Hugs my dear, It is hard enough watching my Grandmother going through this and not know me on the phone anymore - but my own mother:( You are a strong women and this chit-chat and friendly nature you have has seen you through some tough times.
Our children will grow up to handle what life throws at them with all of these moves we have done. My family call me a 'social butterfly' I think that has helped in our moves.
Take care my dear and hold onto the memories that you have with your parents of when chit-chat with them was a daily thing.

Kirsty@Bonjour said...

This is why you had four kids, so they can each take their turn chit-chatting with mum ;))
Have a great weekend!

Amanda said...

Neither my hubby or I are big on talking quite like hours of silence, my son on the other hand started talking before he was 1 was in fact saying full sentences at 1 and he hasn't stopped yet. We know when he is not well because he goes quiet, we know when he is nervous because the talking goes up a notch... he isn't going to be able to be the silent teenager which is probably a good thing, and he always tells us when things are going wrong at school/with friends etc another good thing. My daughter will chatter sometimes, usually when big brother is not around but will go and play in her room for hours.
LOve that the kids talk to you always and admire people that can talk freely in social situations.

Hot Fudge said...

I thoroughly agree with you - boys ARE different and do need that male contact. I feel your pain at no longer being able to connect with your mother. It must be tough. Keep up your wonderful spirit.

Mum on the Run said...

There's a reason it's called 'gift of the gab'!
:-) xx

Polly said...

Thankyou for such a lovely diversion from my Sunday of essay writing? I would much prefer some idle chit chat right now rather than sitting here trying to come up with ideas on confidentiality. I come from a family where it is completely non existant......confidentiality, what is this thing??!! Love you blog and will love even more to follow it. Thankyou for stopping by mine.

Tales of a Tai Tai said...

I LOVE your kids. They're so gorgeous and sound like the best fun to be around! Got a lot to do with their mumma I think ;) x

The Provincial Homemaker said...

Lovely to see your oldest curled up with a book. I miss that as an adult - hours to spend reading without the call of work around the house.